


The Birth of Jim "Castiel" Novak II

by Bellawritesfiction



Series: Castiel Novak [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-26
Updated: 2013-07-01
Packaged: 2017-12-16 06:00:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 11,478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/858664
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bellawritesfiction/pseuds/Bellawritesfiction
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel lost his grace and are searching for help. The first 24 hours after Castiel's "birth" as a human.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Fallen

It looked like a meteor-shower and normally it would have been an awesome sight. Now it was the saddest thing imaginable.

Castiel watched as his peers came falling from the sky as shooting stars. It was devastating to say the least and also a little bit of a shock. He had been fooled by Metatron and felt responsible for it all.

Just dealing with the current events was difficult enough in itself. Understanding the emotions that raged through his body was even harder. Not to mention the pain and the gnawing hunger.

Castiel had been aware of these human feelings and emotions through the remnants of Mr. Novak. Sometimes the guy's soul had shone through and given Cas a glimpse of how it was to be human. It was a long time ago. Jimmy was long gone and when Castiel decided to eat or drink it was only because he'd learned to appreciate a few things, not because they were necessary.

He tried to listen for a call. He tried to connect with the fallen angels or the Winchester brothers but the Angel-radio – as Dean liked to call it – was dead. It didn't come as a surprise, his grace was gone and so was all his supernatural powers. Castiel himself had never thought of it as anything supernatural but for a human it was perceived as such.

The chilly night bothered him somewhat. He had never really felt cold before. Castiel wrapped the trench-coat tighter around himself and started to walk towards a distant streetlight. He knew he had to find people. He was hungry and thirsty and his whole body was aching.

He didn't think he was seriously injured from the fall. Metatron had probably made sure of that. The guy wanted stories and it would be silly to kill his storytellers before they had anything to tell. Castiel figured that this was how humans felt when they were beat up. In a flash he remembered Dean's pained face when Naomi ordered Cas to kill him. The guy had probably been in more pain than Castiel experienced now and still he was able to communicate with Cas to end the beating. Dean was obviously a stronger man than Castiel could ever be.

Moving forward was hard with muscles that screamed for relief but he had no other choice. He needed help and he needed food. And he needed to find his family.

He suddenly remembered the cellphone and dug through his pockets to find it. With ice cold hands he managed to pull up Dean's number and after several rings he hear the familiar voice. "CAS. Castiel. Where are you? We ne..." With a short beep the phone went dead and Cas looked at the black screen.

He'd never had to charge it before. He had the ability to restore the battery's power with a touch. He almost threw it into the woods in anger but braced himself at the last moment. This was the only connection he presently had with the boys and if he didn't know how to charge it he could find out.

It was another urgent need that suddenly presented itself. Cas knew exactly what it was all about and for the first time in his life he felt embarrassed. Being human involved some pretty disgusting things too. Eating and drinking caused these beings to have bowel movements and it was with a sigh Castiel dreaded to have to feel that. Right now it was only his bladder that needed to be emptied but he had no clue how it would work.

Cas knew he had to pull his dick out of his pants so he wouldn't pee on himself but touching the thing was weird. He pointed it towards some bushes. He'd seen this done before and tried to mimic the posture from other men.

Nothing happened. His bladder was aching but there was no relief. Castiel realized that he was very tense and tried to relax and let go of the embarrassment of the situation. A few drops came trickling out and landed on his shoes before a nice spurt followed. The feeling was sensational. Castiel had to hitch his breath in order to compose himself. "So" He thought. "If I do this on a regular basis without waiting for the pain this was not so bad."

He shook the penis as he'd seen others do and tucked it back into his pants. He wondered if it would feel the same if he needed to do that other thing but decided not to think about it. He'd have to ask someone how to deal with it and hoped he would find the boys before it was too late.

Castiel continued on his path down the road hoping to meet someone. The streetlights were far apart so he was mostly walking in the dark. When a set of headlights appeared he got excited. Rescue was within reach. He waved as the car passed but the driver obviously didn't see him and Cas almost fell apart watching the red taillights disappear in the distance.

Slightly blinded by the light from the car Castiel could understand why he wasn't spotted. He decided to walk to the next light and hang there until someone showed up. It didn't take long before another car came around the curve and Cas placed himself under the streetlight so he would be as visible as possible.

The beat up pickup truck pulled over with shrieking brakes a few meters away. An older guy leaned over the passenger seat and opened the door. "Get in. Where you goin'?" Castiel climbed into the truck and sighed. "I don't know. I... Sorry." He tried to think of something that made sense. For some reason he knew that telling the guy the truth would not go around well. "I had an accident. I need to find some people."

The guy lifted his brows. "Are you injured? You need to go to a hospital?" Castiel shook his head. "No, I'm fine." He was not fine, but the guy didn't need to know. "I just need to find my family." Castiel himself didn't really know if he was referring to the other angels or to the Winchesters but it didn't matter at the moment. The guy shrugged his shoulder and the truck started to move forward. "Well I'm on my way home. There's a truck-stop up ahead. You'll get a ride from there wherever you're going."

The ride took about fifteen minutes and not a word was uttered until the guy pulled over at a gas-station. "Behind there it's a diner. You'll find someone to help you." The driver pointed towards a couple of big rigs. "The truckers often like the company." Cas got out and thanked the guy but he just waved him off. "No problem." Then he sped away and disappeared.

Castiel drew his breath and walked towards the door to the convenient store at the station before he changed his mind and rounded the corner. There was a small diner there and a couple of guys were hanging outside smoking and laughing. Cas walked up to them and cleared his throat. "I need a ride."

One of the guys turned to him. "Where you going?" Cas still didn't have an answer to that question so he looked down embarrassed. "I really don't know. My family..." The guys chuckled as Cas tried to find the correct words. "I need to call them but my phone..." He pulled the cellphone out of his pocket and showed them the black screen.

"Oh, it died on you? Have to remember to charge it when you're out here." He laughed out loud. "Far between the stops." He pulled out his own phone. "You can use mine."

Cas took it and looked at it curiously. "I don't know how. You don't have his number." He turned his gaze to the guy and shook his head. Another burst of laughter came and the guy grabbed the phone. "Do you have the number?" Castiel tried to think but realized that he couldn't remember Dean's phone-number. "No. I'm sorry. It's in here." He waved his phone in front of the guy.

The two truckers laughed again. "Give me the name. I'll find it." He touched the screen of his phone and Cas could see that his finger moved over it. "Name?" The man asked again and Cas sighed. "Dean Winchester." He looked at the guy's face as the finger typed something onto the screen. "Winchester? As the rifle?" Cas could only nod and soon he had the phone pressed to his ear.

"Hello." Dean's voice sounded a little tentative but Cas almost fell apart from hearing it. "It's Cas." He hitched out trying to stay composed. "I need help." It took a little while before Dean answered - his voice loaded with concern. "Where are you?" Cas still didn't know and threw the question back. "Where are you." Castiel didn't know if he could find Dean but he was pretty sure Dean knew his own location.

"Hey, you obviously borrowed a phone from someone. Hand it to him or her." Dean voice was strict and Cas held the phone up to the trucker. "He wants to talk to you." The guy looked somewhat surprised but took the phone and uttered an hesitant Yeah?

After a few minutes where the guy was obviously listening to what Dean had to say he nodded and looked over at Cas with concern. He soon tucked the phone into his back pocket and gestured for Cas to follow him. "One of my friends is driving in that direction, come on." The trucker chatted with another guy and after looking at Cas rolling their eyes they'd come to an agreement. "He'll help you." The guy said and walked off.

A half hour later Castiel was in a rig on his way to Omaha. The driver had introduced himself as Nicholas. "You can call me Nick." Cas was about to say his name but changed his mind at the last second. "Jim. You can call me Jim." He somehow knew that the name Castiel could bring up questions and he didn't want that. He wouldn't know what to say.

Cas was still hungry. He had no money and he knew he'd need some if he wanted food. The trucked offered him some beef jerky and Cas had grabbed it eagerly and finished of the bag in no time. He apologized but Nick shook his head and smiled. "No worries."

The drive took about three hours and Nick didn't chat too much. Dean had obviously promised to pick Cas up somewhere and suddenly Nick pulled out his phone and dialed a number. He handed his phone over to Cas. "I'll drop you off at the junction between 680 and 29. I'll take the phone if it's difficult for you to explain."

Soon Dean's voice was in his ear and Cas felt his heart – really Jim's heart – skip a beat. "So where are you?" Cas was about to explain but after offering his apologies he handed the phone back to Nick. "Sorry. I'm... I don't know how..."

He didn't pay much attention to the conversation but he picked up a few lines. "Your brother is doing fine. You can be proud." Cas didn't understand squat but he chose to not comment. Nick kept on talking. "For a guy like that he's very well mannered and it as been a pleasure."

Nick hung up and gestured to Castiel for get out. "You're brother will pick you up here within the hour. Take care." Cas climbed down and waved to Nick as the big rig entered the ramp to the highway.

"My brother." Cas chuckled a little to himself. Dean had called him his brother. It gave Cas a good feeling. He didn't have to wait more than twenty minutes before the familiar Impala emerged. Cas got shivers down his spine. The feelings that raged through his body as Dean came out of the car were very difficult to interpret. Castiel wanted to wrap himself around Dean but knew he had to brace himself.

He was afraid that Dean would be mad at him. Cas knew he'd screwed up big time. He held his breath – which was much harder now when breathing was a necessity – until Dean was standing in front of him. "Cas. CAS! I'm kinda angry with you but... at the moment I'm just happy you're okay." He let his hand land on Castiel's shoulder. "I'm sorry I told them you were retarded. It was easier than to tell the truth."

Castiel looked at Dean puzzled. "Uh?" Then he closed his eyes and nodded. So that's why the truckers acted so weird. That's why they so eagerly helped him. He shook his head and smiled. "Don't worry about it. It got me here." Then he scrunched his face and asked the question that had been on his mind for a while already. "Sam? Is Sam...?"

Dean let his arms fall down to his sides before he sighed heavily. "Sam is … alive." He lifted his arms again and pulled Castiel into an embrace. Cas didn't really know what to do and he just let his hand trail up Dean's back. He felt Dean's body tense up a little before he pulled back. "Uh, come on. We have to get back. Sam is alive but he could really need some of your angel mojo now." Dean stepped away from Castiel and gestured for him to get in the car.

Suddenly Castiel got hit by the reality of it all. Dean needed him to cure Sam and that was not an option anymore. If this was the only reason for picking him up Dean was going to be very disappointed. Over the last few hours Cas had refused to ponder over how his life would be like as a mortal. He'd only been concerned with the new feelings and urges.

Castiel's heart sunk. He had been there to protect them. Now he couldn't do it anymore. He stood there frozen in his step. What would happen when Dean learned that he was a human now. That he was a regular man without any mojo or superpowers. What if Dean realized that he was useless to them. He'd probably walk away and never look back.

Dean turned around and looked at Cas puzzled. "What? Come on. We have no time for sappy reunion scenes." Castiel realized that he had walked backwards away from the car. His eyes were stinging and tears were running down his face. "I can't." He hitched out and took another step back. "I'm not..." He couldn't continue. He wanted to tell but his voice drowned in the sobs that came from his throat.

In a few steps Dean was right in front of him. "You're crying? Cas? You're crying?" His hand came up to Castiel's face an wiped his cheek. He looked at his now wet fingers and then he lifted his head to stare into Cas' eyes. "Angels don't cry."

Castiel closed his eyes. He couldn't bear the scrutinizing look. When Dean's hand again came up to his cheek Cas leaned into the touch and sighed heavily. He took a couple of deep breaths to compose himself before he managed to speak. "I'm not an angel anymore." He had to swallow hard before he continued. "I'm useless to you."

Dean's hand disappeared from his cheek and Cas could hear that he cleared his throat. "Oh. That's a plot-twist." Seconds passed and Cas opened his eyes slightly. Dean was still staring but then he moved forward and wrapped his arms around Cas. "You sure? Maybe you're just weakened by the events."

Castiel shook his head before he leaned it onto Dean's shoulder. "I'm sure." Not knowing what was going to happen next Castiel braced himself. He wanted time to stop so he could stay in this embrace forever. A new feeling had appeared in his head and it made his heart skip a beat. "Dean, I'm sorry... I'm..." Dean's hand crawled up his spine and up to his head. "Shush." Dean whispered as his hand tangled into Cas' hair. "I got you."


	2. Saved

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean brings Castiel to the bunker. He struggles with his own emotions.

The drive back to the bunker took almost four hours and the sun came creeping up on the horizon just before Dean pulled over to park outside. Castiel had been sleeping most of the way and Dean was sort of happy about that. There was about a million questions he would have liked answers to but the feelings that arose in him when he held Cas back there at the junction scared the crap out of him.

He'd always known that he and Castiel had a special connection. They've even been teased about it but Dean had never thought of it as anything more than brotherly love. "Brotherly love." He scoffed by the thought. "I wish."

The fact was that seeing the tears on Castiel's face gave Dean the urge to kiss them away. The realization had startled him and for a second he was hesitant to even touch the guy. The anger he had had towards the angel because of the current events had dissipated in an instant. The only thing Dean wanted to do now was to comfort Cas and help him get through this transformation in one piece.

Maybe not the only thing, but the rest of his thoughts were just a jumbled mess. He tried to push them away as he drove through the night. Every so often he peeked at Castiel sleeping with his head rested against the window. Cas shifted in his seat now and then but except for a a couple of times where he returned the gaze briefly he'd slept like a baby.

"So Cas was a human now. With human feelings and urges." Dean couldn't even begin to wrap his mind around what that would entail. He wondered if Castiel had any clue himself or if it would be like having a toddler in their midst. As an angel there had been several occasions where it was clear that Cas didn't understand the subtleties in verbal expressions. He was easily confused by irony and sometimes by Dean's odd sense of humor.

Other issues emerged in Dean's mind. Castiel had never really had to take a shower or change his clothes before. The angel-mojo had made him clean and crisp with a snap. Now he had to learn how to wash his hair and button his shirt. So there had been a time when Cas didn't remember that he was an angel but Dean had never asked him about the details of that period. It was with a shiver Dean realized that there were other things Cas never had to do as an angel and some of it was slightly disturbing to think about.

Outside the bunker Dean nudged Castiel gently and the guy fluttered his lashes before he sat up. He looked a little confused. "Uh. I slept?" Dean had to chuckle. This was probably another first for Cas. Being in a coma or knocked out for some reason didn't count. This had been a few hours of real sleep for Castiel. "Yeah. As a human you'd need sleep on a regular basis." He patted Castiel's shoulder. "We're here."

Cas got out of the car and looked at the door. "Is Sam in there? Kevin?" Dean came up next to him and nodded. "Yeah. They're both here." Castiel turned to him. "They are going to be angry with me. I don't know how to make amends with them." He looked down on his feet and sighed heavily. "I messed this up majorly." Dean opened the door and pushed Cas inside. "We'll cross that bridge when we get to it. First we have to fix you up, and then ...find out what kind of damage all this has caused."

As soon as Kevin saw them come down the stairs he got up from his seat and charged towards Castiel. "You... you. What did you do? I was... I could have deciphered the tablet and revealed Metatron's betrayal." Dean had to jump in between the two of them to hinder that Kevin punched Castiel. "Stop!" He put a hand on Kevin's chest and pushed him back a little. "Cas screwed up. Yes! But his intentions were good."

Kevin clenched his fists but withdrew from the situation and sat back down with a frown on his face. "All these fallen angels are gonna blame you and we are gonna be caught in the middle." He was addressing Cas but then he turned to Dean. "He shouldn't even be here."

Dean waved him off. "If the same thing happened to them as have happened to Cas we have nothing to worry about." He pushed Cas in front of him towards the back of the bunker. "If they too are humans now they will be disoriented and weak. They wouldn't know the first thing about how to behave or how to find us."

Kevin jumped up again. "Human? What are you saying? Cas is human now?" His voice was shrieking. "So he can't even help us... help Sam?" With a sigh he slumped back in the chair. "I guess he deserved that. We deserved that. But I'm not babysitting a former angel. Count me out."

Castiel walked in front of Dean with his head down. "Maybe I shouldn't be here. I'm just gonna put you all in danger." Dean just scoffed and opened the door to the bathroom. "You need to clean up. You stink." He stepped aside and gestured for Cas to go inside. "Just do your best. I'll get you some clean clothes."

Ten minutes later – after checking on Sam – Dean was back with a bundle of clothes under his arm. He couldn't hear the shower and knocked waiting for an answer. The door cracked open a few inches and Castiel's face appeared. "This is... I don't know what you expect me to do."

Dean rolled his eyes and sighed. "Just undress and get in the shower." He pushed the door open and walked inside. "Here's some clothes you can wear. I think they'll fit." He held up a pair of jeans in front of Cas and decided they would be fine. He dropped them on the floor and showed Cas the t-shirt and the boxers he'd brought also. "Just put these on when you're done, we'll get you your own wardrobe later."

With clumsy hands Castiel started to unbutton his shirt. He'd already shedded the trench-coat and the jacket. Dean leaned down to pulled them off the floor. "I'll clean them for you. Or maybe we should just throw them out."

Cas' hand landed on Dean's shoulder. "The water is too cold. I'm sorry..." Dean sighed and leaned into the shower. "You have to mix it. This is cold and this is hot... Hey, watch! I don't wanna have to explain this again." When the water had a decent temperature Dean turned around to see Castiel buck naked on the floor. "Oh fuck. You couldn't have waited until I was out of here?" He closed his eyes and gestured for Cas to get under the streaming water. "I'll forgive you this time but next time you're on your own."

Dean tried to keep his eyes away from Castiel as he handed him a bottle of shampoo and a bar of soap. "Don't drop it." He blushed as the words came out but luckily Cas was unable to understand the reference. Through his lashes he could see that Castiel looked at the items in his hands with a puzzled face. Dean sighed again. "That one is for your hair. You use a small amount... Oh crap." Dean took the bottle out of Cas' hand and squirted some of it into his own palm. "Get your hair wet." He ordered and Castiel obeyed instantly.

After massaging the shampoo into Cas' hair Dean pushed him under the shower again. "Squeeze your eyes shut and rinse it out." Again Cas did as he was told and managed to get all the shampoo out by himself. Then he reached his hand with the soap over to Dean. "And this one?" Dean almost choked. There was no way in hell he was going to wash Castiel's body. "No. This you have to do yourself. Just make sure you clean your whole body." Dean turned his back on Cas and folded his arms across his chest. "I'll stay if you have questions, but I'm not gonna help you with that."

Just the mere thought of Castiel standing in the shower right behind him was disturbing. He tried to push the image of that naked body out of his head as he picked up the rest of Castiel's clothes from the floor. Castiel needed help and Dean was the only one around willing and able to help him. He knew he was rationalizing but it was the truth. If only those unwanted feeling he'd got wasn't present he could have treated Cas as a brother and helped him through this in a different manner.

For a second he wished that Cas had chosen a female vessel. It would have been so much easier although Dean would probably not have volunteered to soap up that body either. But at least the arousal he was fighting at the moment would have been bearable.

"I think I'm done now." Cas' voice reached his ear and Dean grabbed a towel before he turned briefly to hand it to the guy. "Dry off and get dressed. I'll find some food." He walked out of the bathroom and closed the door before he with a deep breath paused in the hall. "This is just fucked up." He thought as he continued towards the kitchen.

Dean tried to concentrate on his cooking and decided to make a light meal. He didn't know if Sam was even able to eat yet and Cas was a novice when it came to this. Dean worried about the aftermath of Castiel eating but decided to push those thoughts away.

Ten minutes later as the chicken noodle soup was simmering on the stove Cas came padding across the floor. "I think I did good. Thanks for the clothes." He looked down on his bare feet. "It's a little cold thought." Dean chuckled. "Give me a minute I'll find you some socks or slippers. Just need to finish this." He grabbed a spoon and dipped it into the soup to have a taste. After determining that it was okay he went to get something for Cas' to put on his feet.

Dean wasn't even half way to their sleeping quarters before he heard a loud scream and a bang then the sound of something shattering. He turned on his heels and ran back to the kitchen finding Cas on the floor between shards of glass. He was leaning on one hand and covered his mouth with the other. A small pool of blood was visible next to his foot.

"What happened?" Dean leaned down to examine the foot and found that a piece of glass had cut into Cas' heel. Dean pulled it out quickly earning a small shriek from Cas. Then he looked at Cas' face. "What?" Castiel looked down embarrassed. "I bumbed my mound." His hand was still covering his mouth and Dean didn't at first understand what he was saying.

Castiel tried to get up and Dean noticed that he had a spoon in the other hand. "Oh, I see. You tasted the soup and burned your mouth. He chuckled a little. "You have to be careful. That soup is boiling hot. Castiel nodded. "I know now, but you tasted it and..." Dean could only roll his eyes as he helped Cas off the floor. "I have practice. It's a skill."

Kevin was standing in the doorway with a smirk on his face. "So this is what it's like to have a baby in the house." He leaned on the wall watching as Dean maneuvered Cas over to a chair avoiding the rest of the glass. "You have the work cut out for you Dean. This could be interesting." Dean found a broom and a dustpan before he turned to Kevin. "Shut up! Go find some bandages. I'll clean up this."

Kevin pushed away from the wall and walked off. "Bandages? Sure." Dean watched him as he disappeared down the hall. "Don't worry about him. He'll come around. He had a tough time lately." He swept up the glass and wiped the blood off the floor. "Let me look at your foot."

The cut wasn't very deep and it had stopped bleeding already so Dean just made sure that there were no glass left in there. "It'll be fine. How's your mouth?" He peeked up and watched as Castiel let his tongue run over his lips. "It's not so bad. It will be fine." He looked embarrassed. Dean patted his knee as he tried to avoid watching those lips. They were slightly reddened from the burn and they looked very inviting. Dean almost slapped himself. "Get a grip." He thought as Kevin entered the room again.

After cleaning out the cut with peroxide Dean put a band-aid on and went to find socks for Cas. "Don't move." As he passed Kevin he could hear that the guy was chuckling. "I guess you're not so angry anymore?" Dean said with a smirk. Kevin scoffed. "How can I. This is just pathetic."

A half hour later they'd all had some soup. Dean had served Sam in bed and sat with him until he was done. He told Sam about Castiel's misfortune but his brother didn't seem to be concerned by it. "So your angel isn't an angel anymore. Big deal." Dean tried to give him a piercing look. "My angel? So now when he needs all the help he can get he's my angel?" Sam laid down and smiled tiredly. "He was always mostly your angel."

Dean had to turn away when he felt a blush coming on. "I'm gonna go and get some supplies. Will you be fine?" He got up and grabbed the empty soup bowl. Sam nodded as his eyes fluttered shut. "Kevin and Cas are here. I'll be fine. I really only want to sleep."

When Dean a few minutes later told the others about his plans they both startled. Kevin peeked over at Castiel who was now sitting at the table with a book. "I can't believe you plan to leave me alone with him. I'll go with you." Dean shook his head. "No. I can't leave Cas with Sam. He is too clueless to play nurse." Dean was whispering but soon he heard Castiel clear his throat. "I may not have angel-mojo – as you so eloquently call it – but I can still hear you."

Dean squeezed his eyes shut and took a breath before he slowly turned to Castiel. "Cas. I want to trust you in this, but you... you.." Castiel didn't even look up form his book . "I Know. But did you have to put it so bluntly?"

Dean didn't know how to respond. He walked over to Cas and put his hand on the guy's shoulder. "Try to understand, I never meant to be rude." Castiel kept staring at the book. "I know what you mean. It's just..." Eventually he looked up. "I just want you to trust me. I love you, Dean."

A loud burst of laughter came form the couch. "The angel loves you." Kevin was almost squirming in his seat. "What good does that do? Oh, oh... No good." The stare that Kevin gave Castiel was not friendly. "If you think... So that's your best line. That's how you're gonna make him take care of you?"

Dean didn't know what to say. He was taken aback by Castiel's statement and had no idea how to respond. He decided to turn this around and addressed Kevin. "I love him back. He's like a brother to me." The words didn't taste good. Dean knew that the feelings he had towards Cas was way different from how he felt about Sam. He avoided looking directly at Castiel but in the corner of his eyes he could see a spot of disappointment in the guy's face.

Kevin scoffed again and reached for a magazine on the table. "All this brotherly love makes me sick. I thought you hated Chick-flick moments, Dean?" He demonstratively focused on a random article in the magazine. "Okay. I'll stay here with your brothers." The acid in his voice was practically dripping.

Dean decided not to comment. Instead he turned to Cas. "You'll be fine here. Check on Sam and ask Kevin if you need help with anything." Castiel's gaze traveled over to the couch. Kevin grunted a little. "It's okay Cas. I'm gonna be... nice." The last word came out as a huff but Dean took it as a victory for his cause.

He spent some time going through the cupboards and made a shopping list before he peeked into Sam's room. His brother was sleeping soundly. He seemed to be at ease and the breathing was slow and steady. Just as he was about to leave the bunker Cas came running up the stairs and grabbed a hold of his sleeve. "Thank you." A tear was traveling down Castiel's cheek and as a reflex Dean lifted his hand and wiped it away. "Don't..." He let his hand linger a little on Cas' jaw. "I'll be back soon."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter coming shortly. For those who are waiting for porn I have to disappoint you. Still I hope you enjoy. And please tell me what you think about it.


	3. Trust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean leaves to get supplies. He also get some new clothes for his angel. A couple of Chick-flick moments occurs.

The only plan Dean had when he left was to get groceries and other necessities so they could stay in the Batcave for an extended period of time. It took a bit longer. Dean knew perfectly well that he was procrastinating the return on purpose. He didn't want to ponder over it but he felt the need to be alone for a while. He knew that his love for Cas was deeply rooted in his soul but that he got turned on by the guy was very disturbing.

He fueled up Baby and went for a drive around town, the music cranked up to the highest level. He sang along with Robert Plant and Brian Johnson earning curious looks from some bystanders when he had to stop for red lights or something else. Dean didn't bother to turn the volume down. He needed the distraction from the music and didn't care if it annoyed anybody.

When he spotted an Outlet store he pulled over and parked. Castiel needed clothes. For a moment Dean wished he'd brought the guy because he didn't really know what Cas would like to wear.

As he walked around in there he figured that Castiel wouldn't really know either. The guy had been wearing the crappy trench-coat and the cheap suit for forever. Dean remembered the future Cas in his casual clothes and the sick Cas in his hospital wear but that was brief moments in time. Dean was pretty sure that Cas wouldn't care about the outfit at the moment.

Shopping for clothes was not one of Dean's favorite pastime but he spent an hour in there before he had a cart filled with clothes and other necessities for a fresh-out-of-heaven person. He'd added a couple of items for Kevin too figuring the boy needed something extra in his closet. Tucking the purchase into the trunk of the car Dean checked the time and decided to start planning his return.

At a Wall-Mart a couple of blocks away he got almost everything else on his list. He added some ammo and a two quarts of motor oil to the pile and headed for the register. Now he only needed to find a liquor-store. There was no way in hell he was going to stay sober this evening. Dean knew he needed to numb himself somewhat. He'd tried to be on top of things since the trials but now it should be his time to relax.

They would all be okay at the bunker. Sam was slowly getting better. Castiel was safe and Kevin was getting back to normal. That the boy acted like a cranky teen at the moment didn't bother Dean so much. He was pretty sure that Kevin would come around eventually.

Back home it was quiet. When Dean came down the stairs Kevin got up and helped him with his load and together they brought the groceries to the kitchen. "Sam is awake. I brought him the computer." Kevin threw out casually. "He wanted to take a shower but I urged him to wait till you were back."

Dean nodded. "Good. What about Cas?" Kevin rolled his eyes. "I have barely seen him since you left. He locked himself into the bathroom for... forever but..."Kevin sighed. "I think he took another shower." They stocked up the fridge and Dean left the rest of the food on the counter for Kevin to put away. "I'll check on them. Is Cas still in the bathroom?" Kevin scoffed. "No. I had to force him out when Sam needed to go. He has been cooped up in your room till now."

Dean chose to check on Sam first and was happy to find him propped up in bed with the laptop open. "You feel better I guess?" Dean walked over to him and sat down on the edge of the bed. Sam gave him a tired smile. "I'm still a little weak but I feel much better now, yes." He closed the laptop and leaned back. "We have to get out there and find out what's going on."

Dean patted his shoulder. "We're not doing anything before you're back to normal. I can't handle the others alone." Pointing to the computer he got up from the bed. "See what you can find out from that. I'll be back."

As he was about to exit the room Sam tried to get out of bed. "I could really need to clean up. I think I'll feel even better after a shower." Dean turned to him and urged him to get back in bed. "I'll help you, give me a minute to find out how Cas is doing."

Out in the hall Dean had to take a moment to think through everything that was going on. So this was his life now. Training a former angel, nursing his brother back to health and dealing with a teenager with an attitude. It was slightly overwhelming. Fighting monsters and demons was a piece of cake compared to this.

With a sigh he knocked the door to his own room. Not waiting for an answer he went inside and found Castiel sitting on the bed with a book in his hand. "How's it going? Why did you shut yourself in here?" Dean walked over and sat down next to Cas. "We all have to try to get along. We're gonna have to stay together here for a while."

Castiel's lifted his hand and put it on Dean's thigh. "I know, but it feels weird. I feel weird." With a heavy sigh he lifted his head and looked at Dean. "I don't even know my own body. It's not easy to be human." Dean looked at the hand on his thigh and had fight the urge to grab it. "I understand." He really didn't. How was it possible to understand what Cas was going through. Castiel's hand moved a little and Dean almost whimpered when he felt his blood rush towards his crotch. He got up quickly and turned to the door. "I have to help Sam take a shower and then I'll make some food. Sam is better and can possibly get up and eat with us."

He'd already exited the room leaving the door open when Cas' voice reached him. "Uh, I can help Sam. He knows how right? He just need someone there to make sure he can stand on his feet?" The feeling that raged through Dean as he heard the words should not be present. He wanted to be happy that Castiel offered to help. Instead he got seriously jealous thinking about Cas and Sam in the bathroom together.

"I, I... don't know. He's my brother. I should help him." He still had his back turned to the room and he startled when Castiel's hand touched his back. "Trust me Dean. I can handle it. He's like a brother to me too."

Dean swallowed hard. He needed to get rid of these ridiculous feelings he had for Castiel. He took a couple of steps forward making Cas' hand slip away before he turned around. "Okay, it's okay. Come on."

After helping Sam pick out some clothes Dean left the two of them alone and walked over to the kitchen. Passing through the living area he looked at Kevin. The boy seemed to be asleep but got up when Dean approached. "So Cas is gonna help Sam? Wouldn't that be a case of the blind leading the blind?" He laughed a little but obviously noticed that Dean was not amused. "You don't trust him, do you?"

Dean shrugged his shoulders and entered the kitchen with Kevin following right behind. "I do, but, but there are so many things he doesn't know. I worry he'll injure himself seriously one day. As an angel he couldn't be hurt by things that could kill him now when he's a human."

As Dean picked out some bread and started to make sandwiches he noticed that his hands were trembling. He had to teach Cas to be careful. To not jump in front of cars or try to shield the others from bullets. Dean wondered if Castiel himself was aware of how fragile the human body really was. Kevin grabbed his forearm. "Careful. You're shaking. Let me handle the knife."

Dean gave Kevin the knife and pushed away from the counter. "You do it. I'm too tired. I didn't sleep last night at all." Kevin shook his head and then he peeked at Dean. "So get some sleep. I'll do this. I'll make sure everybody get's fed."

Dean went to his room and lied down but couldn't sleep. He could hear water running and went to the bathroom door to eavesdrop. The sound of laughing and giggling from in there made his stomach churn. Dean knew he should be happy about it but he couldn't help feeling left out. He wanted to be the one who could joke around and have fun with Cas. Instead he was bothered by his own carnal urges.

Not only that – although it was startling enough in itself – Dean had to admit to himself that he was in love with his angel. "His Angel!" It was true what Sam had said. Castiel was always mostly Dean's angel.

"I'll be fine now. If you can find my slippers..." Sam's voice came through the door and Dean rushed to get out of the way. He managed to slip into his room before Castiel opened the door. "Under the bed? I'll find them." Dean heard Cas enter Sam's room and only a minute later he was back in the hall. Cas gave the bathroom door a quick knock. "I'll leave them here outside." Dean couldn't hear Sam's answer but when he was sure that Cas left the hall he walked out the door finding himself face to face with the former angel.

"You know I think I have some of that old mojo anyway. I knew you were here." Castiel gave Dean a crocked smile and leaned on the door frame. "How can I make you trust me?" They were standing so close that Dean could feel Cas' breath on his skin. He took a quick note to remind himself to teach Cas to brush his teeth. Not that his breath was too bad but it would be a good thing to learn anyway. Dean closed his eyes. "I, I... it's not that I don't." He couldn't continue. He knew he had to get out of this situation before he did anything foolish.

Dean tried to step back but Cas grabbed his arm. "So there are a few things I don't know but there are also a lot of things I do know." He stared into Dean's eyes as he spoke. "I've studied humans. I know how you act in different situations. How this body reacts to all of this is new to me, but I'll learn." His hand came up to Dean's cheek. "I'd still take a bullet for you though."

Dean startled. "Seriously? Are you really able to still read my mind?" Dean couldn't stop the rush of blood to his face. If that was the case he was so screwed. Castiel let his hand fall down. "No, don't worry. But I'm not stupid. You're afraid I'll be a liability, but I won't be. My human brain knows what can hurt me or even kill me." Cas looked down for a second and Dean scoffed. "Like boiling soup?" Castiel chuckled. "Oh, that, that was just me not thinking. I saw you do it and figured... and remember, I was extremely hungry."

The proximity of Castiel's lips made Dean want to lean in and kiss them but he was saved from his own thoughts by Sam exiting the bathroom. "Hi, guys. What's up?" Dean seized the opportunity to get away from Castiel. "Sam. How are you feeling man?" Sam was obviously still a little under the weather. He was holding on to the wall as he put his slippers on. "Still tired, but I'm definitely better." He sighed. "Could use some help though, I'm a little dizzy."

Dean rushed over and wrapped an arm around his waist. "Hold on little brother. Kevin is making sandwiches." He turned to Cas briefly. "Come on. Let's play happy family."

After they were all fed and comfortable Dean decided to show Castiel what he'd bought for him. Cas acted like a child on Christmas morning and Kevin frowned from his seat. "Did someone have a birthday?" Dean got up from the floor where they were sitting at the moment and threw a bag on to the couch. "I got something for you too." The guy looked into the bag and gave Dean a smile. "Nice. This is really nice. Thank you." He said as he pulled out a pair of jeans and a couple of t-shirts.

Dean turned back to Cas and continued to hand him things from the the other bag. Castiel seemed to be pleased about every item Dean showed him. When Dean presented the leather jacket Cas stared at it for a moment before he let his finger run over the seams. Then he put it on and ran to the mirror to look at himself. "It looks like yours." Cas' voice cracked a as he watched his own reflection. Dean got a little embarrassed. "I hope you like it?" He smiled watching Cas try to look at himself from different angles.

Cas never answered the question but eventually he came back and picked the remaining items out of the bag. It was mostly underwear and toiletries and when Cas found a razor and a toothbrush he wanted to use them immediately. Dean had to chuckle a little as they walked to the bathroom. He offered to help but Cas was adamant about doing it himself. "I've watched you and Sam do this many times, I can handle it."

Dean wasn't sure when that had happened but he figured that Castiel had watched over them unnoticed when he was an angel. It didn't bother him He knew that Cas had been in his head. Ever since perdition he had no secrets from the guy. Not until now anyway.

A couple of small nicks on the chin and a set of bleeding gums later Castiel was done. He looked into the bloodstained sink. "Is this supposed to happen?" He turned to Dean with his eyes wide open. Dean shook his head. "Not normally, but honestly; you did good for your first try." He tried to give Cas an encouraging look. "It will be easier, and less bloody over time."

Two hours later Sam was back in his room. Dean had tried to make him stay with them but Sam was too tired and wanted to go to bed. He'd reassured Dean that he felt much better but that his body was craving rest. Kevin was lounging on the couch trying to find something interesting to watch on TV and Castiel was in the library reading.

Dean stared into the amber liquid in the tumbler. He wondered if Castiel was aware of how boring life as a human could be sometimes. Dean almost panicked thinking about how long they would have to be cooped up in the bunker. He felt restless and antsy already. It didn't help that Cas' presence gave him warm and fuzzy feelings.

He tried to concentrate on the articles he'd found online as he took a sip from the whiskey. The web was riddled with news about the unexpected meteor-shower last night. All over the world scientists were discussing this supernatural event and nobody seemed to have a satisfying answer.

Dean had searched for articles that could have something to do with the fallen angels, but except for one story from a local newspaper somewhere in Arizona there was nothing. A park ranger had discovered a man walking around aimlessly in the woods. He was brought to a local hospital but before a doctor got to see him he'd vanished. Dean knew it could have just been a random weirdo or an Alzheimer patient but he bookmarked the page to show it to Sam later.

He had another shot of whiskey and welcomed the buzz from the alcohol. He knew he needed sleep but couldn't make himself go to bed. The others depended on him. Dean was perfectly aware that he couldn't stay awake forever but he wanted to wait until Kevin and Cas decided to turn in too.

A tap on his shoulder startled him and he turned abruptly. Castiel was standing there with a book in his hand. "I found this. It's about how to detect angels. We can use it to find them." The pleading look on his face made Dean a little emotional. Castiel wanted to find his peers. "Are you sure you want to find them? They may blame you."

Castiel nodded slowly. "I know, but I have to explain myself. They have a right to know what happened." Dean could understand what Castiel meant but he was still hesitant to agree with him. "They, they may want to kill you." Dean hitched his breath from the mere thought of losing Cas to a bunch of vengeful angels.

Again Cas just nodded. "If it's meant to be, it's meant to be. They are my kind, I have to try to help them regardless." Dean was not able to control himself as he jumped up from his seat and wrapped his arms around Cas. "No, Cas. They are not your kind anymore. You're human. You're our kind." He let his hand travel up Castiel's back and leaned his head on the guy's shoulder. "You belong here with us, with me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter will be posted shortly.  
> I'm a big fan of a little feedback.


	4. Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel is enjoying himself. He reads a lot and he is genuinely happy. When he decides to sleep in Dean's bed Sam is worried.

"You belong here with us, with me."

Realizing he'd said the words out loud Dean froze before he let go of Castiel. "I mean, I, you, oh fuck. We need to stick together. The four of us. Eventually we'll find out what's going on out there." Dean felt embarrassed and wondered if Kevin had heard anything. Castiel was just standing there looking at him curiously. "Eventually? When Sam is better? When Kevin has deciphered the tablets? When, Dean?"

Dean was happy that Cas didn't mention the chick-flick moment and he shrugged a little. "Don't know. At least not until Sam is fit for fight. In the meantime I'll train you to be a hunter. For real." He stared into Cas' eyes. "Forget it for now, please." Dean knew that it wasn't only the words about the angel hunt he wanted Cas to forget.

Castiel looked a little disappointed but with a sigh he nodded. "Okay, you're probably right. We should wait." As he turned to go back to the library he added. "I know I belong with you Dean, I just wasn't sure you knew." With that he was gone leaving Dean puzzled behind. "Aww!" Kevin uttered from the couch and Dean quickly snapped back to reality. "What? Don't even..." He shot the boy a piercing stare and without looking he searched for the tumbler on the table. He grabbed it eagerly before he poured the liquid down his throat.

Kevin had turned to the TV again but the little smirk on his face told Dean that he hadn't missed a word of the conversation between him and Cas. Kevin managed to keep his mouth shut possibly slightly intimidated by Dean's grave face. Dean turned away and went to get another glass from the kitchen.

\----

Castiel was enjoying the time in the library. He was a quick reader and had already plowed through a couple of short novels since he came to the bunker. Boredom was in Castiel's opinion man's favorite pastime but he couldn't understand that. How could one be bored with so many new things to discover. Cas realized that he'd have many hours in front of him with all these books. He would have wanted to find the angels as soon as possible but he could also understand Dean's point of view.

Cas startled when he heard a sound behind him. When he turned around Dean was standing there with two glasses of whiskey in his hands. "Thought you might want some. Here." He handed one of them to Castiel and added. "Be careful though. No angel mojo will prevent you from getting drunk."

Castiel grabbed the glass and took a sip. "Mm, good. Thanks." Dean lifted his glass in a silent toast but he didn't drink. "Cas I hope you didn't misunderstand me. I, I mean. We..." Castiel smiled and shook his head. "No. I did not misunderstand. You made yourself perfectly clear." He took two steps forward and took Dean's hand in his. "And on the other issue. It's okay. We can stay here and wait it out. I trust you Dean." He let go of the hand and gestured to the bookshelves. "And I have enough to do to pass the time."

Dean was about to say something but it was interrupted by a yawn. "Sorry. I'm tired." He rubbed his eyes quickly. "Cas, I think maybe you... I meant, oh forget it. I'm sorry for not trusting you fully. I hope you can understand." Castiel wasn't quite sure but he had a feeling that Dean was about to say something else. He knew that the guy wasn't particularly into emotional moments so Cas let it slide. He grabbed Dean's hand again. "I understand but trust me now. You need to sleep. Get some sleep. You can not help me or Sam if you don't take care of yourself."

Dean squeezed Cas' hand gently. "I know. I should." He sighed and finished his drink before he pulled his hand out of the grip. "Give me a couple of hours. Promise to wake me up?"

Castiel smiled at him and nodded. "Promise. Go. We'll be fine. I'll take care of Sam." He watched as Dean padded across the floor and headed for his room. Castiel was a little embarrassed by his little lie. He had no plans to wake Dean two hours from now. Dean needed more sleep than that. Cas knew what the guy had been through lately and sleeping was not something he'd done too much of.

As soon as Cas was sure that Dean had finished in the bathroom and had entered his own room he tiptoed through the hall and checked on Sam. The guy was still sleeping and Cas closed the door quietly. Then he walked over to Dean's room and put his ear to the door. It was quiet in there and Cas was satisfied.

Back in the library he picked out a random book and walked to the living area to sit by the table. He poured himself a generous amount of whiskey and opened the book. He didn't get to start reading because Kevin came over and sat down across from him. "How did you manage that? I mean, getting Dean out of our hair." Cas looked at the guy puzzled. "What does our hair have to do with anything? Oh, I see." He smiled shyly. "I'm learning." With a little chuckle he added. "I promised to wake him in two hours, but I'm not going to do that."

Kevin drew his breath and smiled. "You conning little angel. You lied to him. That's funny." He reached his hand out towards the whiskey bottle but Cas pushed it away from him. "I'm not an angel anymore and you, you're not old enough for that." He looked at Kevin and furrowed his brows. "You didn't think I'd care, did you?" Kevin tilted his head from side to side. "Honestly? I didn't think you knew."

They stared at each other for a few seconds before Kevin got up. "Can I have a beer then?" He was already on his way to the kitchen but turned to wait for Cas' answer. Castiel didn't know how to reply. Kevin was a teenager and according to state law he was not allowed. Cas didn't even know how he had this information but it didn't matter at the moment.

He leaned back in his seat and sighed. "Well technically you have no guardian so I could act as such for the time being." Kevin rolled his eyes. "Yeah, and...?" Cas chuckled. "Well I guess a beer is okay. Go ahead. Let's be a little daring." He held up a finger. "Only one though, and don't tell Dean."

Kevin was gone before Cas had finished the sentence but was back seconds later with a beer in his hand. "Pshaw! Like Dean is the most law abiding person on the planet." He sat down at the table again and opened the bottle. "What are you reading?"

Cas didn't even know. He closed the book and looked at the cover. "The Poetic Edda. I don't know what it is about." Kevin laughed. "I know. I learned about it in my humanities class. Norse myths. Not an easy read. Good luck." He got up from the chair again. "Well enjoy, I'm gonna go back to my show." He padded over to the couch and slumped down. Then he turned to Cas and gave him a quick smile. "By the way. What is this between you and Dean?"

Cas didn't really know the answer to that. "I can't explain. My human feelings and emotions are pretty raw. I just know that we belong to each other." Kevin rolled his eyes. "And Dean knows too?" The look on Kevin's face was hard to decipher but it could be disbelief. Cas didn't care what the boy thought. "Yes. Dean is aware of this. He told me." Kevin just shook his head and turned to the TV. "This could be interesting." He said mostly to himself and Castiel chose not to comment.

The next couple of hours they pretty much minded their own business and hadn't exchanged many words. Cas was fine with that. After a while Kevin found some snack foods in the pantry and offered Cas some chips and nuts. A set of pleading eyes had made Cas cave in and he let Kevin have another beer. Castiel checked on Sam regularly. He was happy to see that he was sleeping calmly but when Cas peeked in for the fifth time Sam was awake. He asked for help to go to the bathroom. "Where's Dean?" He asked as he leaned heavily on Cas' shoulder to steady himself. "Quiet. He's sleeping." Cas put his finger to his lips. "I want him to sleep as long as he needs."

Castiel scooted Sam into the bathroom and waited for him outside. He knew that humans preferred to do this alone. When Sam came out again clinging to the door frame Cas was quickly at his side to help him back. "No, I need something to eat and drink. What time is it anyway?"

Castiel had no clue and they walked together to the kitchen before he was able to check. "It's almost seven. I'm a little tired too. Maybe we all should go to bed soon." Cas gave Sam a quick peek and the guy chuckled. "My internal clock is so screwed up, but normally this is kind of early for a grown-up."

Castiel helped Sam down on a chair and went and got the nuts and the chips Kevin had provided. "I don't know what's an appropriate sleeping pattern but I haven't slept much since, since." He sighed heavily. "Since I became a human." Sam looked around. "Yeah, and this hole." He made a gesture as to include the whole bunker. "This hole have no daylight. It's easy to get confused." He threw some nuts into his mouth and nodded towards the whiskey bottle. "Give me a little of that. This much." His thumb and his index finger was about a half inch apart. Cas got another glass and gave Sam the bottle. "You do it. Take as much as you want."

Sam seemed to enjoy the whiskey and he except for the droopy eyes he looked almost like normal. "The healing process is quick I guess." Cas smiled at him. "Looks like you're beating this thing." Sam shrugged a little. "Wouldn't know. Never done this before." He chuckled and took another sip from his glass. "This was probably not the best choice for a drink. I think I need water."

Castiel went to the kitchen to get some water for Sam. "Do you need any food?" He asked as he came back. Sam shook his head. "No, nuts are fine." He grabbed another handful as to demonstrate the fact.

"Sleeping arrangements. Did Dean make any plans?" Sam shifted his gaze between Cas and Kevin. Kevin waved and shouted out: "Until anything else is determined I'll take the couch. It's comfy." Sam turned to Cas and lifted a brow. "You?"

Castiel didn't even understand why he got this question. "I will sleep with Dean." Sam almost fell over and had to grab on to the table laughing so hard. "In Dean's room? You will sleep in Dean's room?" He managed to say between the bursts of laughter. Cas had no idea what was so funny. "Did I say something wrong?"

Sam managed to compose himself. "It's just, just the way you said it. Sorry." He shook his head. "You're gonna sleep in Dean's room? Yeah, that's gonna go around well." Cas was puzzled about the tone in Sam's voice. "Why is that funny?" He repeated hoping that Sam would explain himself.

"I'm not so sure that Dean is aware of this. His bed is not that big." Sam took the last sip of his whiskey before he chased it down with some water. "I would have loved to stay awake long enough to see that happen but I think I need to turn in now." He gestured for Castiel to help him up.

As they walked through the hall Sam looked at Castiel. "I think you're making a mistake. But go ahead." Cas chose not to comment until Sam was back in bed. As he was exiting the room he turned to the younger Winchester. "You can laugh all you want but me and Dean belong together. He knows that too."

After a trip to the bathroom Cas went back to the living area to find that Kevin was dozing off in front of the TV. There was a blanket hanging over a chair and Castiel used it to tuck the boy in before he turned the TV off. He took a quick round to turn off the lights and check that everything looked okay before he brushed his teeth - not bleeding so much this time - and entered Dean's room.

Dean startled when he woke up wrapped around Castiel. The guy was snuggled close into Dean's body with his face buried into the crook of his neck. "How the hell did this happen?" He thought trying to wiggle himself out of the embrace without waking Cas. He felt he was in a state of shock and his thoughts made somersaults in is head.

Castiel grunted a little in his sleep and rolled over giving Dean an opportunity to sneak out of bed. He looked at the clock and realized he'd been sleeping for almost eight hours. Dean almost panicked from the thought of what could have happened during those hours. He reminded himself that he'd promised to trust Cas.

He'd promised to trust Cas and then this happened. He'd obviously disregarded Dean's request to wake him after two hours. And then he'd decided to sleep here. Dean took a deep breath and looked at the guy snuggled up under his blanket. He had to admit to himself that it was definitely not repulsing. On the contrary. Castiel looked like he belonged there. Dean knew he had to clear his thoughts and snuck out of the room.

First Dean checked on Sam. He was happy to find that his brother was sleeping soundly and Dean closed the door. He wandered further and found Kevin nicely tucked in on the couch. Dean agreed with himself that Castiel had handled things nicely in his absence.

The whiskey bottle on the table was half empty and an open book was laying there next to it. Dean didn't know what to do. He was still tired but going back to his own bed was not really an option. Or maybe it was? He poured himself a small amount of whiskey and gave it a thought.

It didn't take more than a second to realize that it was the only thing he wanted. He wanted to get back in bed with Castiel and cuddle up with him. It was a scary thought but somewhat comforting. Dean could pretend that he was never out of there and when the shit hit the fan he could blame Castiel. Suddenly the whiskey didn't taste so good. If the shit hit the fan he had to man up and take whatever came.

When Dean came back to his room Castiel was still in the same position as when he left. Dean snuck under the covers and tried to get comfortable leaving a little bit of space between them. It didn't last long. "You came back." Castiel's arm wrapped around him and he felt the guy's lips on his collarbone. "When you left I worried that Sam would be right, but you came back."

Dean didn't know what Cas was referring too. "Uh, Sam?" He pulled away slightly and looked at Cas. Cas tucked his face into the crock of Dean's neck again. "Sam told me not to sleep here, but I knew you wanted it. I worried for a while when you left but you came back to me." Dean let his hand run over Castiel's backside. With a startle he realized that Cas had absolutely no clothes on. He hitched his breath from the mere thought but composed himself quickly. "Yeah, I came back. I had no choice."

He tugged Castiel closer and kissed his forehead. "I don't care what Sam said, but he's a fool." Dean closed his eyes trying to forget about the implications of this. The fact was that he really did care about what Sam had to say about this but pushed it away. "Cas? I have no idea about what we're doing." He had to swallow to be able to continue. "I know you're my angel, but this..."

Castiel's hand came up to Dean's cheek. "I'm not your angel anymore. I'm your Castiel, your Cas or... your Jim, if you like." The hand trailed down to Dean's chest. "I don't know anything about this either. I just know that you and me belong together and that I love you."

Chick flick moment Chick flick moment Chick flick moment. The words were practically flashing before Dean's eyes and it was embarrassing. Still he let his thumb run over Cas' upper lip before he leaned in and gave it a quick peck. "I think, I think, for me you will always be my angel."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah. All the fluff.
> 
> There may be a sequel. You want a sequel?
> 
> I'm a cheap whore and I'll do the sequel if only two people want it. Give it to me.
> 
> Okay, Sequel is coming. Hopefully soon.


End file.
